Sacrifice to Smiles

This is Jinlee-- she's a 3 year old missionary on base and brings me a lot of smiles.

I've been on mission in Haiti for 67 days now and one thing is for sure...I miss home. Because leaving home meant I had to make a lot of sacrifices and that's truthfully been quite uncomfortable and quite difficult.

I thought I would share at least some of those sacrifices, despite the common practice of most missionaries to avoid the topic, because after all, a large part of the Gospel is in fact about sacrifice. However, let me not set this up as a venting session about my "inconvenienced" time in Haiti (which is an entirely relative term), rather a time to also highlight many redemptions, because sacrifice, without redemption would be meaningless--just ask Jesus.

1. Running water is not a guarantee here. And if we've got it, it isn't safe to drink.
2. Ice... what is that again?
3. I live on a base...all the time. No coffee shops, or grocery stores, or fast food, or driving to a friends house right down the street...ever.
4. I live in community with about 30 other very different people--enough said.
5. Rice, beans and chicken are on the menu...every.single.day.
6. Sleep...what is that again?
7. I sleep with, shower with, and just plain live with a lot of bugs--most of which look like they've been pumped with steroids.
8. We have electricity for 5 hours a day...most of the time. Sometimes, not at all.
9. It's hot...all the time. No seriously, I live in my sweat.
10. Personal space is non existent.
11. We start every morning with 2-3 hours of prayer...in a language I don't speak or understand.

Now, these are small sacrifices, but when added up, equal quite a bit of frustration and discomfort. But, that's why they're sacrifices, right. So, here is the beautiful thing about being here in Haiti. Despite these random 11 things that I chose to share, there are SO many more things that make me smile each day and remind me why I am here. Here are just a few things that have made me smile, quickly overshadowing the surely small sacrifices. 

1. Three little boys asked me to air up their soccer ball so they could play on the base. Their joy over something so small lit up my heart.
2. Watching the Haitian women dance and sing in the kitchen while cooking. Beautiful.
3. Creatively communicating with someone I don't share a language with. Funny, and effective.
4. Giving God the first fruits of my day...every day. Necessary and a gift.
5. Having 30 other faithful, prayerful, people right next to me if I am struggling with something. 
6. Making funny faces with/at the Haitian teens because we can't communicate and knowing that it's enough to build a relationship.
7. Not constantly having a t.v., or computer, or phone, or electricity available actually allows for less distractions and more relational time. Amazing.
8. Walking into a home and praying with a family I have never met, may never see again, but knowing that God is working and will continue to work beyond that moment.
9. Only having to walk 2 minutes across the base to go to Mass, to get food, to clean clothes, or to go to the beach.
10. Living on the base with a priest and having a chance to go to Confession anytime I want/need to.
11. Being challenged in ways that I know will help lead me to Heaven.
12. Little children at the orphanage literally playing with dried corn cobs... and totally happy.
13. Having food to eat...every.single.day.
14. Knowing that my small sacrifices can help bring others to Christ.

This list is clearly not exhaustive, but I hope shows some of the joy that is found in my time here in Haiti. As I write this, I even smile remembering that Mother Teresa, in all her wisdom, said "Every time you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing." Today, I am smiling in my sacrifices so that I can love the people in Haiti even with cultural and language barriers. And, in two weeks, I will be smiling through sacrifices at home--because let's face it, in order to love, sacrifices must be made anywhere we are.

Wisdom Found in Selfies

Natalie is at an orphanage in Haiti. Please pray for this little 9 year old gift from God.

As I sat on a dirty slab of concrete, on a monastery mountaintop in Haiti, holding little orphan Natalie on my lap, she grabbed my phone and began to take pictures. The complete joy she exuded from something as simple as selfies brought tears to my eyes. She took many photos of our faces, hers covered in sugar from the ring pop I gave her, and mine sharing a smile, from the great joy the Lord brought to both of us. But there was one photo she took that imprinted an image, not just in the data of my phone, but in my mind and my heart. It was this photo of our feet:

There is a verse in scripture that came to mind immediately for me. How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of him who brings glad tidings, announcing peace, bearing good news.
 -Isaiah 52:7

I look at little Natalie's feet and I can't help but feel overwhelmed by the beauty of them. At 9 years old, this little child, abandoned by her natural family, has been blessed with a family of nuns who run the orphanage, along with 50 other children.* She, in all her rights, could be an angry child, full or rage for being abandoned, and full of questions of God's love of her, yet she lives simply in the peace of the Lord and others, because those who were not her family at birth have taken her in and care for her. She has found family through the love of those serving God. She has found peace and glad tidings from the many feet that have trod across that space, be it passing by missionaries or the sisters at the orphanage, and she herself, because of that, brought glad tidings to me on the mountaintop too, and how beautiful are those feet that have done that for me?

I find great wisdom in Natalie. She has challenged me in my daily walk to bring glad tidings to others, regardless of my lot in life, announcing the peace of the Lord and bearing good news. Too often I let the words that escape my mouth, or even my presence, set a temperature of frustration and fatigue in a room. Too often I am not sharing good news at all, but gossiping or complaining. Too often, my feet, through perfectly pedicured and cared for, are quite ugly, for they don't at all times walk in the way of the Lord. What Natalie taught me in her joy of selfies, her sugar covered face, and her scarred and shoeless feet, is that I must find joy in the simple things, and let the love and light of Christ shine anywhere I am. Thank you Natalie, for the way you helped me to see Christ that day and inspired me to continue to walk in His ways all the days of my life.

I challenge each of you to reflect on the path your feet take. Do they lead you and others to Christ? If so, how? If not, what can you do to redirect your path? Trust in the Lord to lead you, for "In his mind, a man plans his course, but the Lord directs his steps." -Proverbs 16:9

Feel free to share your thoughts with me. It helps my heart to grow. Thanks!

*The orphanage where Natalie resides was completely pancaked in the earthquake of 2010. It was one of the rare days that absolutely no one was in the building, so all 51 children and those running the orphanage survived. Absolutely amazing.